As the Slovenian Mrs. Waterford that is Melania Trump wondered when it was a good time to bust out her escape plan by changing into a Corgi costume before humping Prince Philip’s horny ole’ leg so he can take her inside, her master Donald Trump bonded with THE QUEEN during their meeting about their love of not paying taxes and their little bitches (hers being Corgis, his being his sons). THE QUEEN had to deal with Trump herself, but sources tell The Times of London (via The Hill) that the next Kings of England, Prince Charles and Prince William, were supposed to make an appearance, but made like the hair that was on their head and said “fuck it” before quitting that shit.
24-year-old Harry Styles finished up his first tour Saturday in Los Angeles, where he performed his last show in Harry Styles: Live on Tour at The Forum. Since it’s Hollywood and going to a concert is a form of self-promotion in itself, a whole bunch of celebrity-types were in attendance. People reports that Kendall Jenner attended her ex-fake-boyfriend’s show, as well as Shawn Mendes, Meghan Trainor, Phoebe Tonkin and Michael Clifford (of 5 Seconds of Summer).
Harry got all emotional and shit during his last show and decided to tell the audience how much he loved and appreciated them.
When fifth-in-line to the crown Prince Louis arrived to St. James’s Palace for his Christening last week, his grand entrance wasn’t so grand. I was expecting some razzle-dazzle, like a Kensington Palace-branded t-shirt gun fired by Unky Harry. But all we got was Duchess Kate carrying a bundle of curtains with a sleeping Prince Louis inside, then later, a partially-awake Prince Louis. Obviously Prince Louis was saving the charm for the official portraits released after the show.
Demi Lovato is in “the news” for holding hands with a man after leaving Warwick nightclub in Hollywood. Can you imagine getting in “the news” for holding hands? Demi’s PR whore is probably starting the week off right by getting a “job well done” bonus from her. Continue reading
Despite Pete Davidson putting an engagement ring on Ariana Grande’s finger last month, the cynical love-hater in me had a tiny suspicion that they might not make it to a wedding. I saw it more as a relationship based on getting tattoos that would meet its end when they ran out of room on their bodies. But if the sleuths on the internet are to be believed, then I’m very wrong. Not only is Pete serious enough about Ariana to give her his father’s FDNY chain, it might be a clue to their wedding date.
Elon Musk did not come off as likeable this past week, which is really saying something for a guy who is worth more than small countries and dates celebrities who are way hotter than him. Over the weekend a few bits of less-than-great information dropped about him.