Archives: August 2018

Afternoon Crumbs

August 31, 2018 / Posted by:

Meanwhile at the Venice Film Festival, an army of gay ostriches were seen marching through the streets ready to attack Lady Gaga for brutally slaughtering dozens of their friends and wearing them at the premiere of A Star Is Born. Trick probably dressed like a damn feather duster to dust away any bad reviews, which apparently there haven’t been any. So Leonardo DiCaprio should practice his laugh, because there’s a good chance we’ll be living in a world where “Oscar nominee Lady Gaga” is a real thing that exists – Just Jared

My thoughts and prayers are with the Scientology minion who was sent to Gold Base after fucking up by not giving Tom Cruise high enough cha cha heels so he’d be taller than Henry CavillLainey Gossip 

Jesus Jugs, formerly of Real Housewives Of Orange County, is getting $16,000 a month in support from her ex-husband, and that might seem a lot, but I’m pretty sure she spends more on bronzer a month – Reality Tea 

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As Expected, Aretha Franklin’s Funeral Was A Star-Studded Musical Extravaganza

August 31, 2018 / Posted by:

After two days of public viewing (featuring a costume change and a gold casket, no less), today was the day everyone gathered and honored the life of the Queen of Soul at her funeral. But of course a legendary diva like Aretha didn’t go out with a couple eulogies and pastor-led rendition of “Amazing Grace” before a lunch of sandwiches in the church hall. That gold casket should have been your first and only clue needed to know Aretha would absolutely going out like a legend in an all-day, star-packed memorial service.

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Open Post: Hosted By The Seal Who Just Wants To Be Friends With A Butterfly

August 31, 2018 / Posted by:

Sometimes you just have odd couples that make you wonder how they got together in the first place…like Sonny and Cher, peanut butter and bananas, and that time Paris HiltonLindsay Lohan, and Britney Spears all hung out (yes, I know that is technically a throuple, but cut me some slack: it’s Friday!). Well, if you happened to find yourself at the Oregon Zoo in Portland recently, you may have seen a new odd couple: Kaya, a baby harbor seal, saw a butterfly on the other side of the glass to her tank and decided she just wants to be where the people, er, butterflies are!

Like all good flirts in the club, Kaya just kinda wanders alongside the butterfly and stares it dead in the eyes like the creepiest of stalkers. Then, it turns into some light hovering and chasing before you see Kaya start to wave and do flips to charm her new friend. I mean, Kaya totally wants to eat the damn thing like it’s a good mid-morning snack, but, thanks to that glass, we can all tell ourselves it’s a magical moment of friendship. Plus, the next round of acid trip Lisa Frank folders can include butterflies and seals skipping through a hologram forest!

Pic: YouTube

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Stephen Belafonte Wants Temporary Custody Of Mel B’s Two Younger Daughters

August 31, 2018 / Posted by:

I can hear this picture, it sounds like an L.A.-by-way-of- Leeds accent, and it says: “He wants WOT?

Earlier this month, we learned that Mel B and Stephen Belafonte had finally settled their divorce. Stephen’s getting $20,000 a month, which includes $5,000 for child support of their 6-year-old daughter Madison Belafonte, and $15,000 in spousal support for himself. Mel B and Stephen had also reportedly agreed to share custody of Madison. Stephen may be ok with the money, but not the custody. TMZ says that Stephen appeared in court today, claiming Mel isn’t fit to care for her three daughters, because she’s drunk all the time. Here we go again.

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Ruth Wilson Says There’s A Big Story To A Recent Development On “The Affair”

August 31, 2018 / Posted by:

The last couple of seasons of The Affair, like any long-term relationship, were getting a little stale. Sure, it started with hot waterfront boning in the Hamptons, but then it just dissipated to a bunch of tired tricks talking about feelings and not showing enough skin. Well, this season actually got interesting, especially when… (SPOILER ALERT AFTER THE JUMP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) 

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The Same Dude Will Be Playing Charles Manson In “Once Upon A Time In Hollywood” And “Mindhunter”

August 31, 2018 / Posted by:

There’s typecasting, and then there’s very, very, specific typecasting. And then there’s Charles Manson casting, which Australian actor Damon Herriman has fallen victim to. He’s been cast to play Charlie in two different productions. According to Collider, Damon has already filmed scenes as Charlie for the upcoming season of David Fincher’s Netflix series Mindhunter. And it’s just been announced that he was signed to play Charlie in Quentin Tarantino‘s Once Upon a Time In Hollywood which maybe they should considering renaming Twice Upon A Time.

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